Lstrblg

A 15 meter-long pliosaur with jaws that put T-Rex to shame. Sure, it died out 140-some million years ago, but try telling my imagination that.

Also scary, blue holes. Pathway straight to Cthulhu, if you ask me.

The Constitution Center in Philly is asking people to come up with six words that Pres. Obama should add to his inaugural address. Mr. Obama will face a crowd of millions, with tens — if not hundreds — of millions more watching on TV, and apparently the Center thought he could use some help…and they could use some publicity…

Putting words in his mouth is a tricky proposition, and I think it might be helpful to feel out the borders of good taste for the Constitution Center people. You know, a touchstone they could test against for appropriateness.

So, some six word phrases that shouldn’t be in the inaugural address:

• I will devour your filthy souls
• Damn, its brisk out here, people!
• Hopeity, bopeity, shmopeity, blah blah blah
• Wait, women can vote for president?
• You get a car…and you…
• I will grow a Lincoln beard
• Can I get a wave going?
• Eloi, Eloi, lama sabachthani, just kidding
• My new ranch in Crawford, Texas
• You get a bailout…and you…
• But first, hold hands and sing
• Ph’nglui mglw’nafh Obama R’lyeh wgah’nagl fhtagn
• Everyone, hold hands and concentrate…LIFT!!!
• Pass the plate, please, the deficit…
• I really am a Secret Muslim
• It really isn’t a great job
• Build, build, build my golden idol

Please suggest some more. And I will immediately ask Obama not to include them in his speech.

Ia Ia Cthulhu f’froggan

Part of an ongoing series of highlighting things that would likely kill you, given the opportunity.